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How To Sh*t On Your Own Doorstep – Almost

October 20, 2011 by  
Filed under Revenge On Neighbour

I’m not sure if the title of this article is globally recognised, but from where I come from it’s widely recognised.

Like families, getting revenge on your neighbour can pose a few challenges as you have to live next door to any consequences.

This is made worse if the desire for your revenge is borne out of a long standing dispute or feud.

And let’s be honest here, if anything goes wrong in *their* life, it’s always *your* fault!

However, this doesn’t mean that you should refrain from getting revenge on them – far from it in fact. To get revenge on your neighbor can be deeply satisfying. You are close enough to the action, so to speak, to see first hand the result of your handy work.

Bear in mind though that sometimes, you need to be as much of a victim of revenge as your neighbour in order to appear credible and, most importantly of all, innocent.

Let’s look at just one example (I’ll post more later as time goes on) … gardens.

Gardening is an ever growing hobby and once the green finger bug has bitten, it can be completely absorbing and people readily spends hundreds of dollars/pounds/euro and hours creating their perfect garden paradise.

So that makes the garden a perfect target … but the problem with that is that your garden is next door, so anything that affects their garden will affect yours.

For example, you can’t kill your neighbours lawn and leave your’s untouched as if by magic.

But, how about this … if you are planning on remodelling your garden at some point in the future and can put up with a little mess for a few weeks, then you can start to poison their plants/trees/lawn and also do some damage to your own.

And the best weapon for this is salt.

Forget weedkiller, it’s too obvious.

Just plain old sodium chloride is all that is required – and it’s cheap :-)

Salt will kill plants so much quicker than weedkiller – including trees and shrubs which usually tolerate a little bit of poisoning.

Over a period of time, sprinkle copious amounts of salt around trees, bushes, shrubs, flowers, patches of lawn etc – the more you add, the quicker the result.

However….you need to ensure that the salt gets dissolved before anyone finds out. Large patches of white powder will certainly raise suspicion, so make sure you do this on a damp night, just before are after a period of rain or watering.

TIP - if you don’t want to destroy part of your garden, use the salt trick on a piece of your neighbours garden that they have recently worked upon. That way, they’ll immediately think that they’ve done something wrong :-)